BAD TO THE BONE: Memoir of a Rebel Doggie Blogger BY BO HOEFINGER
2. Favorite place to sleep?
In the dark, on the bed, in my father’s spot.
3. Favorite food?
C’mon, there’s nothing better than peanut butter. Peanut butter covered pills, peanut butter covered biscuits and, although I haven’t seen them in the store aisles yet, peanut butter covered kitty snickers. (Hello, Purina, you listening?)
5. Favorite thing to chew?
As with most things, my tastes have changed over time. At first I enjoyed the taste of the family furniture. Then I realized the synthetic leather of my mother’s shoes was much tastier and easier on the mouth. Of course, this was around the time I was introduced to the Kong. Put peanut butter in a Kong and that’s like sending me to daycare for 8 hours.
Now, I’m about 120 in human years, so the only thing I like chewing is Tapioca pudding.
6. Indoors or Outdoors?
Since I’ve lived inside my whole life, you’d think I’d say indoors. But no, I enjoy the outdoors. My formative years were spent in the northeast, with all the splendid snowstorms it offered. I loved it. Loved being outside. Loved digging my nose deep into the snow. Loved the cool weather.
It should come as no surprise then that my parents moved us to the South. They’re spiteful like that.
7. Are you embarrassed by dog outfits?
Depends on what I’m wearing.
My parents surprised me one year with a Darth Vader costume for Halloween. It was the coolest thing ever. All the kids where like, “Whoa, look at the doggie. He’s so cool.”
9. Hair cuts or the natural look?
I go with the natural look because, quite honestly, I won the gene pool lottery.
12. What cute thing do you do for a treat?
I give paw, officially known as The BoPaw. I sit, raise my paw, and simultaneously turn my head 45 degrees. No human has been able to hold on to what’s in his/her hands when fully applied.
Of course I could play dead, but at my age I’m afraid they might not think I was playing.
13. What most do you like to bark at?
Squirrels. You know, those rats with bushy tails.
15. Would you chase a squirrel right now if you could?
Yes. It is my duty as a dog to do so.
16. If you catch something, what do you do with it?
Keep in mind the last thing I caught was a cold.
17. World domination or too much work?
World domination, as long as it fits into my waking hours from 10 am to noon each day.
20. What book would like to chew the cover off?
Dewey the cat’s book. C’mon, a book about a cat? And a best seller at that? Am I bitter?
Anything else to bark about?
I always want to remind folks to adopt your next pet from the local animal shelter, rescue group or animal welfare organization. There are so many loving animals in need. That one dog, or yes even a cat, staring back at you from the other side of the steel bars will change your life for the better.
My book is dedicated to rescue and shelter workers who make this world a better place, one animal at a time. I donate 10% of my proceeds to help homeless dogs…and cats.